Archive for the ‘Toddler Bedtime’ Category

Bed-Wetting Regression and Mama Guilt

I’m just about to finish my third week of working almost full-time for the first time in seven years.  Prior to having my first daughter in October, 2006, I had been working 20-25 hours/week running my consulting business that I started in 2003.  So it’s a big change on multiple fronts.

I remain enormously grateful for the work and am enjoying writing for my new client. And the separation during the day from the girls has been hard for all three of us in different ways.  In addition to the girls crying a lot more and clinging to me a lot more during the dinner hour, all of our emotions are manifesting physically:

My sadness and guilt and worry goes straight to my jaw.  Over the last year, my unconscious teeth grinding at night has gotten pretty severe.  Two years ago, my teeth were perfectly aligned and my bite was even.  Now, just looking at my face you can see the awkward way my top and bottom teeth come together. Last week I managed to lose my sexy nighttime mouth guard – darn it all. (more…)

Posted in AP and Working Moms, Bed-Wetting, Toddler Bedtime | No Comments

When You Actually Love the Bedtime Stall Strategy

“Mama – let’s have special time together, OK?”

“OK, sounds great!”

“Let’s snuggle and then you can scratch my back.”

“OK angel, let’s do it.”

“I want you to do five shapes, then five numbers, then five letters.”


“No. How about seven shapes, then seven numbers, then seven letters?”

“How about five?”

“Mmmmm. How about three?”

“Excellent.  Three it is….”

I then proceed to scratch variations of all of the above on her back while she delights in guessing what I’m doing. At age 3 1/2, she’s doing remarkably well at this little game.  She consistently nails most shapes and certain numbers and letters (1, 2, 3, 4 and s, i, m, c, and x).

We’ve been doing this since I started working last week. It’s a bed time routine that feels fun and sweet for both of us and makes up for lost time together during the day.

Last night, it got sweeter. Her going-to-sleep stall strategy was unexpectedly quite brilliant. After a long series of “7 each” letter, number and shape back scratchings and two solid foot rubs, I said, “OK Angel Face, time to say ‘Good Night.'”

“Wait Mama!  I want to scratch your back and rub your feet.”

(Um….ok!)  “OK Sweetie, that sounds nice!”

I was already completely sold and wrapped around her finger when she enthusiastically scratched my back and rubbed my feet for 20 minutes straight. Then her sweetness doubled and I wished we could freeze time and snuggle up together in her twin bid forever.

She asked me to move my body so that my feet were more accessible to her for rubbing. I ended up rather contorted and she saw that my head was starting to fall of the edge of the bed.

“Mama, I need to hold on to you,” she said.  “Because I really love you and I don’t want  you to fall off.”

Call me Butter.  I think I finally left her to sleep at 8:45 tonight.

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Posted in Attachment Parenting, Toddler Bedtime | 9 Comments


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