On Being Born

By Monica Cravotta  |  Published: Wednesday, November 4, 2009

I celebrate my birthday today and find myself feeling enormous gratitude for my life and for being born to the parents that I was.

Thank you mom and dad for bringing me up exactly the way you did!

Throughout this site I will be talking about all kinds of things related to pregnancy, birth, and parenting practices for which I advocate, that my parents may or may not have done in the early 70’s.

Does that imply that I view their choices as wrong?  My immediate answer is, “No”.  Parenting  thirty-five years later than my parents, I am working with different information not available when I was born.

I love something that my husband’s step mom, Liz Cravotta, said to us after Sadie was born. She said, “You know, I think for the most part, parents just do the best they can and hope their kids forgive them when they grow up.”

Hear! Hear!

As long as we all choose to be conscious and reflective about our parenting choices and choose to stay informed on the latest science to know what’s best for our children emotionally and physically — I believe we are then truly doing the best we know how and we must be compassionate with ourselves and with our parents for doing things differently.

Through the Internet, we have access to information and the ability to learn so much so quickly and to connect with others in a way that never ceases to blow my mind.  What a magical time to be alive!

I love my family. My parents, my brother & his family, my sweet, gorgeous husband, my three beautiful girls and all my husband’s family. Life is good.

Posted in Empathetic Parenting | No Comments

Toddler Parenting: “Some Days are Aces, Some Days are Faces, Some days are 2’s and 3’s”

By Monica Cravotta  |  Published: Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Thank you Ben Kweller for the amazing poetry in your lyrics. I love Ben’s entire Changing Horses album.  Every song.  And these lines from his “Fight” song might be my favorite:

“I’m like my grandma
Short but I stand tall
Playing every single card that’s dealt to me
Well you know some days are aces
And some days are faces
Well some days are 2’s and 3’s.”

I wouldn’t call the last 24 hours a 2 or a 3, but we certainly experienced a few less than face cards beginning with: Izzy, our one-year-old, pooping on Mark’s lap while they were both nudie-rudy in the tub and Mark handing me the small log to dispose of.  Next in line: (more…)

Posted in Empathetic Parenting | 2 Comments

When does AP go too far? Watch the movie Away We Go

By Monica Cravotta  |  Published: Monday, October 26, 2009

Away We Go Trailer

So I actually really enjoyed this movie despite its AP bashing. I particularly liked the main characters played by John Krasinski and Maya Rudolph and the 100% Alexi Murdoch soundtrack.

It was one of those movies that technically should be in the chic flick category and therefore begrudgingly watched by my husband.  But  Away We Go offered just the right combination of quirkiness and adult humor to have my husband totally on board. In fact, he picked it out.

In the movie, a 30-something couple, pregnant with their first child, decides to travel around the U.S. to find the best place to settle down as parents. This multi-city setting choice for the script worked well aesthetically, providing a lot of great contrast for the scenes. It also served as a convenient way to couch the real journey taking place for the couple which was not so much an exploration of different cities, but of different types of parenting styles and parenting experiences.

(more…)

Posted in Breastfeeding, Co-Sleeping, Empathetic Parenting | 7 Comments

Lessons from Kohn’s Unconditional Parenting

By Monica Cravotta  |  Published: Sunday, October 18, 2009

“The way kids learn to make good decisions is by making decisions, not by following directions.” (Kohn, pg 169)

THE BOOK IN A NUTSHELL

If you’re looking for a quick disciplinary fix for toddler tantrums or basic non-compliance, Alfie Kohn is not your man.  He’s not about quick – nor about fixing for that matter.  In fact, he challenges you to slow down and reconsider the entire Behaviorist discipline model that guides most families and schools today.

Rather than using rewards or punishments to cajole or direct behavior, Kohn suggests we put the relationship at the center of parenting to attend the larger aim of meeting a child’s basic need to feel loved unconditionally. Unconditional Parenting is a provocative read backed with a ton of research that ultimately pushes for a paradigm shift in the way we love our children and guide them to become moral people. (more…)

Posted in AP Book Snapshots, Empathetic Parenting, Unconditional Parenting | 1 Comment

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