A Moment of Truth


So I’ve been wondering how long I can keep this up. Super over-stretched on the work front. Crazy pills really. And moving family out of house and back in. Planning a birthday party for my girls. Preparing for family coming to town tomorrow. And trying to keep up with weekly music lessons, soccer practice, parent meetings at the preschool…..getting remaining copies of Sweet Songs sold so I can write a check to the Milk Bank……(by the way….please join our Facebook page if you haven’t already!)

So in spinning those plates,  I have had no time for friends.  And I continue to feel bad about this.

Yesterday I happily said Yes to a lunch invitation with two of my favorite Mama friends in Austin, Bridget and Chelsea. I adore them. We met while pregnant with our second babies as we shared the same midwife and had due dates within a few weeks of each other. We bonded instantly and got together regularly during the year after the babies were all born.

I invited them to Whole Foods to eat lunch together on the patio, soak up some beautiful October sun, and get reconnected.

Half way through lunch I cried as I told Bridget and Chelsea how much I loved and missed them.

I then asked if they’d like to come up to my office on the 6th floor and check out the digs.  When we entered the elevator, I saw someone from my team.

I said, “Hey Chad, I want you to meet two of my favorite friends, Bridget and………….”

I looked at Chelsea’s face, my friend of two years that I adore, and her name was NOWHERE in my brain.  Nowhere.  I panicked thinking I was experiencing early onset of dementia, a mini  stroke, maybe a brain aneurysm……what??!!

I just stood there helpless, dumbfounded, and mortified.

After a long minute of WTF, Chelsea looked at me with cocked head and wrinkled eyebrows and said, “Monica, I’m Chelsea.”

Knowing that she’s reading my blog (Hi Chels!).  I write this to her:   Chels — hopefully you know you’re quite present in my heart and mind all the time — and this was the sad Moment of Truth that highlighted the degree of my current state of overwhelm and exhaustion.

I powered my way through family dinner and soccer practice last night and when it came time to read stories and sing songs with the girls for bed time, I was asleep between them after one story. 8:00 pm.

With 10 hours straight of sleep under my belt, my brain is working much better today.

I Love you Chelsea!

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5 Responses to “A Moment of Truth”

  1. Dawnie says:

    Know your chuck in Tennessee loves you even if you forget my name. (This is not meant to make you feel guilty!) There is no deadline for reconnecting. Chucks will always be here. Love you, girl!

  2. chelsea says:

    Awwww, you don’t have to explain! I have soooooooo been there. I love you too!! Can’t wait to see you and the girls this weekend, and let’s try to do those lunches more often!

    Love and extra hugs,

    chelsea

  3. Monica,

    I feel for you. I hope that you can find some relief soon! 🙁

    I’ve been a huge fan of your blog for a long time (we met at the Flashmob) and I wanted to tell you that my friend Kim and I found ourselves together in the same car with our 9 month olds talking about how we both REALLY want a copy of Sweet Songs but find it hard to run that quick in and out errand with baby in tow! So I said, “hey, let’s just go to Waterloo right now!!” For you to fully appreciate this you should know we were on our way back from San Marcos and it was 4:30 on IH35…. and when we got to the downtown area and my daughter woke up very ready to be out of the car seat it quickly hit me that it is the first day of ACL and this was a huge mistake!! haha. But two AP mamas powered through together! The glory of two mamas in the car is one can drive and one can entertain cranky babies! 🙂

    We made it to Waterloo and bought 5 copies of Sweet Songs between the two of us!! It was worth it in the end because the babies cheered up and we were happy to get that “errand” out of the way and to support this great cause and have this beautiful piece of art finally in our possession!

    I listened to it with Keiran as soon as we got home and it is so awesome. After I put her to bed I came out and listened to some of it by myself! When I caught myself singing “Baby got stuck in the bumbo” with no baby around I had to turn on the grown up music!! haha, I’m sure you understand 🙂

    I love the CD. It’s truly beautiful.. great work!! 🙂

    -Jessica

  4. Barbie says:

    monica, that was so funny. I so didn’t think you were going to say that. I think we can ALL say we’ve been there in some form or fashion.

    Hope you are all doing wonderfully,
    Barbie

  5. Elizabeth says:

    I agree with Dawnie, there is no deadline for reconnecting. Being gone so much…well there are friends I haven’t seen in months. But everytime I do see them it’s sweet and easy as it always was. Most of my friends are just as busy as I am between work and kids and life in general. So we all cut each other mad slack and enjoy each other when we can.
    Which is not to say I don’t have total breakdowns about feeling like I’ve abandoned my friends. I do. It’s just that not one of them has ever tried to make me feel bad about not being around. And when I think about that, I can see how truly luck I am!

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